The Politics of Sex, The Principle of Pleasure
by David J. Leonard | NewBlackMan (in Exile)
In a society that routinely demonizes women, particularly women of color, because of sexuality, that rationalizes sexual violence through tropes and narratives of hyper sexuality, that sanctions and ignores sexual harassment, and that polices the clothing, the bodies, and sexualities of women, any discussion of sexuality is immensely political. In a country defined by a history of sexual violence, one where white masters routinely raped African American women and justified their violence with references to black female sexuality, the politics of pleasure are never simply a frivolous exercise.
We live in a society where men and women get messages about whose pleasure matters, who has ownership over another’s body, where women, particularly women of color, are reduced to some of one’s parts; the questions around sexuality and pleasure are immensely political.
How else do we explain the pornographic standard of male orgasms? How else do we explain popular culture emphasis on male-gaze, one that places women as objects to be consumed along a pathway to pleasure? How else do we explain what Heidi R. Lewis’ highlights in her brilliant article (“Li’l Wayne and the New Politics of Cunnilingus in Hip Hop”), where she documents the relationship between hip-hop and cunnilingus (which led to countless conversations). How else might we explain the narratives about giving a woman oral pleasures (“cranial maneuvers”) as “gross,” “dirty” “nasty” and otherwise “unnormal”?
Emily Heist Moss, with “Why Is ‘Going Down’ Often a One-Way Street?” makes this clear:
No partner should be compelled to perform any sex act because the media says we shouldlike doing it. Obligatory action may get the job done, but do we really want our partners suffering through something they don’t enjoy? The list of ways to be sexual is ridiculously exhaustive, and ruling one thing off the menu shouldn’t ruin anyone’s experience.
That being said, fellatio has become a mainstay of pop culture portrayals of sex and an expected part of most heterosexual encounters. There’s nothing inherently wrong with that, but there is something wrong when the reciprocal act is deemed “gross,” “unclean,” or “icky.” If putting your face in someone else’s lap gives you the heebie-jeebies (for whatever reason), then don’t do it. But, if you’re expecting someone else to put his or her face in your lap, then you really need to reassess your sense of fairness. And if you’re one of the heebie-jeebie types, it’s probably worth asking yourself where those icky feelings are coming from. This is the body you’re going to have for the rest of your life, so you might as well learn to have some fun with it.
The question of pleasure and whose sexual gratification is tantamount is telling, in a society where women, particularly women of color, are required to put their needs aside, to delay their own gratification for the good of the family, community, and even nation. “Black women are expected to take care of others' needs before their own (others= family, partners, employers, colleagues, everyone else, non-black and black),” notes Juliana Chang, adding “Claiming that they deserve care and love IS political. Who "deserves" care and love is a political issue. Sex is an issue of care, not just pleasure.”
The politics embedded within and revealed by the resistance to see sex and sexuality as immensely political has grave consequences. Just ask Eve:
Eve, who asked that her real name and age remain confidential, spent two years in prison. During her time behind bars she was raped and contracted HIV. Upon release, she was forced to register in the state’s sex offender database. The words “sex offender” now appear on her driver’s license. “I have tried desperately to change my life,” she says, but her status on the database stands in the way of housing and other programs. “When I present my ID for anything,” she says, “the assumption is that you’re a child molester or a rapist. The discrimination is just ongoing and ongoing.”
Eve was penalized under Louisiana’s 205-year-old Crime Against Nature statute, a blatantly discriminatory law that legislators have maneuvered to keep on the state’s books for the purpose of turning sex workers into felons. As enforced, the law specifically singles out oral and anal sex for greater punishment for those arrested for prostitution, including requiring those convicted to register as sex offenders in a public database. Advocates say the law has further isolated and targeted poor women of color, transgender women, and especially those who are forced to trade sex for food or a place to sleep at night.
In 2003, the Supreme Court outlawed sodomy laws with its decision in Lawrence v. Texas. That ruling should have invalidated Louisiana’s law entirely. Instead, the state has chosen to only enforce the portion of the law that concerns “solicitation” of a crime against nature. The decision on whether to charge accused sex workers with a felony instead of Louisiana’s misdemeanor prostitution law is left entirely in the hands of police and prosecutors.
“This leaves the door wide open to discriminatory enforcement targeting poor black women, transgender women, and gay men for a charge that carries much harsher penalties,” says police misconduct attorney and organizer Andrea J. Ritchie, a co-counsel in a new federal lawsuit challenging the statute.
Let's also quit the nonsense about how women use sexuality as a source of power: There is NO "balance of power." Given the ways that sexuality is defined, given the prevalence of sexual violence, the sexualization of women, sexual harassment, micro aggressions, and whose pleasure is seen as primary, the power differentials are clear. The politics are evident in the fact that men are celebrated as "studs" whereas women are demonized and denigrated, denounced and ridiculed as “that girl.”
When all is said and done, men rarely have to worry if a sexual interaction ends in orgasm; women can't say the same--and for me, that has political meaning. And of course, the politics don’t need to be wrapped up in misogynistic and patriarchal sensibilities, but mutual pleasure, enjoyment and satisfaction. As Brittney Cooper noted on twitter, “But don't men recognize that sex is better if your partner is giving pleasure that is not altruistic, but mutually beneficial?”
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David J. Leonard is Associate Professor in the Department of Critical Culture, Gender and Race Studies at Washington State University, Pullman. He is the author of the just released After Artest: Race and the War on Hoop(SUNY Press) as well as several other works. Leonard is a regular contributor to NewBlackMan, layupline, Feminist Wire, and Urban Cusp. He is frequent contributor to Ebony, Slam, and Racialicious as well as a past contributor to Loop21, The Nation and The Starting Five. He blogs @No Tsuris.
